I bid you farewell...

Looking back with a years perspective, I think the key things I would suggest after my surgery are - 

  • If you make the decision to have surgery then go with that. Face the facts & act. Don't waste time second guessing or wishing things were different.

  • Find a surgeon that you trust and with a good admin team backing them up. Then trust them and do what they suggest.

  • Get as fit as you reasonably can before the surgery. The fitter you are the quicker you recover.

  • Work on pelvic floor exercises for a month or two before surgery. If possible see a specialist physio and get an ultrasound so you can tell you are doing it right. 

  • Have as much sex as you can pre-surgery, and come on everything you have ever fantasised about coming on. 

  • Plan around how to sexually interact with your partner without the ability to maintain an erection.

  • Prepare a 'recovery nest' that you get onto from the same side that you get into bed (easier for catheter management).

  • Put at least four weeks aside for recovery.

  • Go into the operation with a positive mindset and with some clear recovery goals.

  • Thank everybody who helps you at the hospital post surgery. If anyone goes above and beyond their job, remember their name if you can and mention them in the post surgery review that you'll get sent. 

  • Take large baggy hipster-style underwear into hospital so you can fit the catheter bag comfortably.

  • Take all the pain killers they give you. Don't be tough. And don't forget the stool softeners - the subsequent constipation is terrible. 

  • Have some incontinence pads & pants available for when you get back, as the catheter can leak from the entry point.

  • Stay mobile. Do your recovery exercises. Push your walking a little bit, but don't rush into heavy exercise. Be careful with lifting at around week 3-4 when you feel healed but you are not. 

  • Make a list of the things that you miss doing the most, and do them once you've recovered.

  • When you start to move away from home, find a phone app that shows public toilets nearby. You can also qualify for a disabled toilet key.

  • Don't be ashamed to wear pads or incontinence products.

  • Don't panic if sexual recovery appears to 'stall' compared to continence, it just takes longer to get there. There are many fun options to try in the meantime. 

And on that note, I'm signing off. I probably won't add anything further to this blog and to be honest I'd be very surprised if anyone will ever read it. But if you do dredge it up from the depths of the internet as part of your research on prostate surgery, I hope it is useful to you and good luck with everything. 

Cheers - Mike

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